Two friends of ours we've known for the past five years are expecting a baby early next year. Of course we are happy for them. This will be their second and last child. Yesterday they had the ultrasound to find out the sex of the baby. The wife was telling me how it went, she said her husband was so nervous before the ultrasound because he was worried something might be 'wrong' with the baby. Once he realized all the arms, legs and body parts were there he was relieved. This is a event not so unlike what most parents experience during those ultrasounds...if you've heard it once you've heard it a thousand times: "Does he have all his fingers, all his toes?" Now I think really, would your life be so devastated if your child was missing a finger? missing a toe? From my unique vantage point that would be just a minor inconvenience. Has knowing us made them nervous? Here we are your 'All-American' family of 4 raising a disabled, wheelchair bound child - is the portrait of our life what they would never want? Do they ever stop to realize we have a good life, we love our son...just as much (maybe even more) than we would if he were 'normal?'
Raising a child with significant special needs changes ones perspective about all sorts of things. Most of all I see people as being naive, thinking something like this would never happen to them. The truth is there are couples all across this world from every walk of life raising children with special needs. I would imagine not many of us could've seen our life turning out quite this way. But I would also venture to say quite a few of us feel like it's blessed our lives more than we could've ever imagined.
There's not much I can do about other people's perceptions, they will think what they think. As for me I am thankful I have been 'changed by a child.'
